Bella Ciao
Memories is all we’ll ever have, don’t we? ~ Author
Personal stuff!
“Nothing will happen to me. Isn’t it?”, I recollect she had randomly asked me exactly twice when we were at the hospital as she was receiving treatment for her illness under close diagnosis.
Her health was showing promising recovery. And, I did reassured my grandmother that we’ll both return home in no time.It had already been 5 days and that painful day, I even remember her requesting my maternal uncle (her son), and did so repeatedly, pleading him to take her home — safe and sound — just for once!
I remember we were all positive about her prospective well-being.
I remember keeping up with her diet chart.
I remember logging in her water-intake sheet.
I remember her holding my hands when she couldn’t stand and sit on her own.
I very much clearly remember our very last happy day!
I remember her final meal.
I remember all the struggles she embraced, fought and endured in hope,
for hope.
[…]
And yes, she did finally leave the ICU bed,
[…]
but at the expense of her life!
[…]
She never returned home.
And, I couldn’t save her.
And now that, that has happened — at least once a week my brain without-a-miss references the fragments of my memories with her, and mostly not-so-pleasant ones.
And, before sadness swallows me,
I cling to distractions.
I reckon,
Life is not designed to be fair.
It will never be fair!
And, the best we can do is — do what’s best for us
given all sorts of unanticipated and thick circumstances,
far beyond our control,
beyond us.
It is for sure that my love for my grandmother (despite her physical absence) will never get less or cease to exist … until I do.
On the same token,
I hope you too will love your mattered ones — fully, selflessly, unconditionally — whenever you’ve a chance … whenever you can.
And, please do celebrate life around you
— whenever you’ve a chance … whenever you can!
Bella Ciao Eme!
